Addie C. Jones Can Chew Gum
Author: jill
•10:12 AM
When you are the third of three children, you always feel behind the others. They go to school, you do not. They get to stay up late, you do not. They can read, you cannot. And, they can chew gum ... but you are too little.

How do we know that Addie C. is too little to chew gum? Because we have tried ... and she always swallows it. The good news is that the length of time the gum is in her mouth (before swallowing it) has increased dramatically. For instance, the first time Addie C. tried gum, it remained in her mouth approximately thirty seconds before she announced it was gone. But now the time has grown to thirty minutes until we hear, "Uh-oh ... I swallowed it."

Do you remember the first time you tried gum? I don't. But I do remember my Grama giving me pieces of Juicy Fruit and Chiklits. Oh, how I love the little mutlicoloured Chiklits. I quickly graduated to bubble gum and I have very vivid memories of learning how to blow a bubble. I had the procedure down, but it took me a long time to master it. It was something that I had worked and worked on ... because I just had to do it. See? Even back then I made silly goals for myself. And I can even remember where I was when I finally did it. I also know that I could not have been more than five years old because we still lived at Rondeau Park. When I was three years old, my parents built a house there and we would live just outside the Provincial Park until I was almost six years old. Since there was only a corner store, we had to travel twenty or thirty minutes into Ridgetown for our groceries. So, on this particular day, I had twenty to thirty minutes to practice my bubble-blowing technique. In those days children did not have to sit in a car seat or a booster seat; in fact, they did not even have to wear a seat belt.

I am old, aren't I?

To tell you the truth, I probably had such a great view from the back seat because I was sitting on a case of empty beer bottles. Ha! Those were the days.

Anyhow, I can still see the road in my mind. We were just coming up to a big bend in the highway when it happened ... I blew a bubble with my bubble gum! I felt like I had really accomplished something. Something that I did all by myself, without any help from anyone.

So, when Addie C. kept bugging me for gum when "the big kids" had some, I could understand. She wanted to get it ... she wanted to learn to chew gum. And the only way to learn a skill (if that is what you want to call it) is to practice. So, every once in awhile, we give Addie C. a piece of gum and then wait to see what happens.
Last week, we gave her a piece of strawberry flavoured Bubblicious - cut in half. Because when you are a princess, you must have pink gum. And she chewed and she chewed and she chewed. In fact, she chewed for so long I finally had to force her to throw it away.

She did it! She chewed gum ... just like the big kids!! And she was so proud of herself.

"Daddy, guess what I did?" she said. Jonesy had a flash of fear go across his face because usually this question does not lead to anything good. But Addie C. continued the conversation before he really had any time to react. "I chewed gum ... for weel."

So, now every day she begs us for gum. Which is cool, but a whole new situation has arisen. She pulls the gum from her mouth, making the long string; she sticks her gum on the floor and then puts it back in her mouth; she rolls it into a ball between the palms of her hands and then puts it back into her mouth. Yesterday, she stuck it to a chair.

"Ummm ... Mommy, look at dis," Addie C. said. Again, this is not a great way to start a conversation with Addison because it usually means trouble.

"Oh," I said. "What is this? Do you know?" I used my finger to try and scrape the "stuff" off the seat of the computer chair.

"Yes," she giggles, chewing away on her strawberry flavoured Bubblicious. "Dats my gum."

"Isn't your gum in your mouth?" As if I don't already know the answer to my question.

"Yeah," she tells me. "Dats my gum and dis is my gum. I think it got stuck." She thinks it got stuck ...

Can you imagine sticking your gum to the seat of a chair ... even if it is in your own home ... and then putting it back in your mouth? Ugh.

So, I am waiting ... because I know the day will come when I am asked the question.

"Mommy, how do you blow a bubble with your gum?"

And, I will have an answer because I am an accomplished bubble gum bubble blower.
, | comments (1)
Flashback
Author: jill
•12:50 PM
I told the court about a political cartoon I'd seen several days before. It showed a child watching television - the Simpson trial.
"What's the forbidden N-word, Mommy?" asked the little girl.
The mother answered, "Nicole."
                  - Marcia Clark, in her closing argument for
                           People vs. Orenthal J. Simpson

It seems as though I have been transported back in time ... to June 1994. All the names are familiar, some I will never forget. It is beginning of what would become known as the Trial of the Century.

Did you watch the OJ Simpson trial on television? I am a law junkie ... you know this already if you are a regular reader of this blog. Of course, I watched it. I watched as much of it as I possibly could. I hungered for more, hanging on every legal phrase and making my own interpretations - which, in all honesty, sounded more like the ranting of a teenage girl than an adult who had recently graduated from University.

"Oh my God ... he is totally sedated. Look at him ... he can hardly keep his eyes open. I bet that lady is smart, but her hair has got to go."

In June of 1994, I was unemployed. Jonesy and I had only been married a couple of months, and had moved into an apartment in the small town where he worked as a Loans Officer for a Bank. We didn't know anyone in town except the old ladies at the Bank, so I didn't have any friends close-by; and I was searching for a job. By that point, I had that frantic feeling that I would never find a job and was destined to do nothing with my life.

If only I could have had the Internet with a blog to write ...

So, without any real purpose in my life, I became an OJ Trial junkie. I watched as much of it as I could. In fact, I think it was the only time in my whole life that I actually enjoyed doing the laundry. Because ... I had to fold the clean clothes somewhere so it might as well be in front of the television, right? And, I am also sure that Jonesy's dress shirts have never been ironed with the precision of detail as they were in those first few weeks during the preliminary hearings of the Simpson Trial.

I have been rivetted this last week while reading, Without a Doubt by Marcia Clark. It is her account of the Trial of the Century, and she holds nothing back. She tells it like it was ... or, how it was for her anyhow. It takes her almost five hundred pages to unload and she doesn't spare any details or anyone's feelings. She describes what was happening behind the scenes on the Prosecution Team and she thoroughly lays out the evidence against OJ.

You know, I wanted to like Marcia Clark. I really did. But she is not a warm and fuzzy person, and to me, she seemed emotionally void and unavailable. That is quite an opinion, considering that I have never spoken to the woman. But I say these things to make a point. When I wrote about The Tipping Point by Malcolm Gladwell, I described the three personalities that are needed to create an epidemic - think of OJ's guilt as the epidemic that needed to be spread. Click here for a refresher. Marcia Clark knew the evidence against OJ better than anyone. She could explain the DNA findings, the timeline, the players, the motive, the law. She is a wealth of information with regards to this case. What Ms. Clark is not ... is a salesman. Remember that a salesman is a person with an indefinable quality that draws others to him/her. They are "cool" and have a contagious energy. They are charasmatic. Marcia Clark does not have that indescribable quality that makes a salesman. She is really smart, and she knows the law but she is not full of charisma. I am sure that she is a super nice person, however, on television I just could not connect with her. And, I think she had the same problem with the jury. They just didn't relate to her ... not because of the colour of her skin or her changing hairstyles or because she was a woman. Just of because of who she is - it's just her.

Marcia Clark has not had a fairytale life. She describes her crumbling down home, leaking more with each rainstorm. She filed for divorce the same week as the Simpson-Goldman murders, and her ex-husband sued for custody of her little boys during the middle of the Trial. She was sexually assaulted as a teenager, and she was in a violent relationship herself as a young adult. And as she was growing up, her family moved around a lot because of her father's job. Just as the family would get comfortable, and friends were made, they would have to pick up again and start over in a new town. I have not written about this before, but I have been noticing a trend. It seems that people who move around a lot as children have a difficult time establishing lasting friendships and/or relationships. I'll have to look into this topic more sometime...

The one thing that Marcia Clark and I do have in common is the love for our children. She is absolutely crazy for her little boys ... just like all moms. She describes how much she wanted a baby and her struggle to get pregnant. And then, once she was pregnant, she revelled in her growing tummy. She wrote as though she were a giddy school girl as she reminisced about that time in her life. It was very sweet.

If we could have seen that side of Marcia during the trial, I think that she would have been more revered by all as a hero. She is funny at times, remarkably empathetic (toward the victim's families), as well as extremely knowledgable and confident. Plus, she swears like a f*cking trucker - which I f*cking LOVE!! I wish that we could have known this Marcia but instead, we just saw a cold woman who sometimes came across as though she didn't care whether we liked her or not. She didn't wear her heart on her sleeve.

Let me just add one thought ... I do not think that it is important to do things just so that people will like you. I hope you know me better than that by now. However, when you are playing at the level of the Simpson trial, you do need to play the game a little bit. A little politic-ing (is that word?), make nice with the Press. I don't recall the Prosecution taking their outrage to the Press/Public in the same way that the Defence did. I wanted to see Marcia Clark flabbergasted by some of the Judge's decisions and perhaps, make a couple of jokes. You know, be a person with an actual personality. Because that is how you get to know someone; and if you know the person, you tend to understand what it is they are trying to tell you. You trust them; you "get" them. This case was tried in the Press and you remember the power of the Press, right?
I will say, though ... Marcia Clark is a trooper. I have got to give her credit for the show of strength that she managed to put on every day. After reading the book, you will understand that she was literally falling apart, trying to function on three and four hours of sleep a night until her body would just collapse in exhaustion. There are times where she was reduced to tears in her office - and I don't think the tears had anything to do with being a woman, I think they had to do with a lack of sleep and a high level of stress. You know what I'm talking about, right ladies? Sometimes that release of emotion can solve all the problems of the world. For me, anyhow. The stress that poor woman was subjected to must have shortened her life span by three to five years. You cannot live under that kind of stress for an extended period of time without it impacting on your physical and mental self. This I know from experience.

I would love to lay out all the evidence against OJ ... because it is so overwhelming. You would be left without any doubt of his guilt. But Marcia does detail all the evidence and it is truly incredible. If you are interested in the specifics of the case, I would suggest that you read this book. As I read, I would gasp and then relay the information to Jonesy - sort of like I used to way back in 1994. I cannot understand how he was found not guilty.

Well, that's not true. I do understand why he was found not guilty.

The Dream Team. Wow ... what a show they put on. As a defense, it was really a work of pure genius. I do not like what they did, however, I appreciate what they did. Do you know that they did not dispute (at any time) that the blood found at the crime scene was OJ's blood? Nor did they try and dispute that the blood found all over OJ's property was that of Ron Goldman and Nicole Brown. The basis for their defense was that LAPD contaminated all the evidence. There were some stumbling blocks, but it was proven that there was no contamination and there was no evidence planted. However, by that time, the Jury had been influenced and some doubt had been introduced. At one point, the Defence tried to say that the blood collected had degraded to an unacceptable quality and that is why it was a match for OJ. Ha! So, Marcia had to put an expert on the stand to explain that if a blood evidence is contaminated or its quality becomes substandard, it produces no results. It does not turn into someone else's blood.

This is how the Defence spent their time ... wielding these ridiculous smoke screens, and forcing the Prosecution to deal with them.
The first mark of success for the Dream Team was when they advised the Defendant to invoke his right to a speedy trial. It forced the Prosecution to move in an unprecedented time fashion. For example, the normal time frame to prepare for a Preliminary Hearing is about three months. Marcia Clark had one week. This push to move things forward was crucial in the success of the Defence.

The other thing they did was create confusion. They took things way off course and forced everyone to look at things that had no real bearing on the case. But by the time the Prosecution took the time to prove how ridiculous the Defence Team's accusations were, the original point/evidence was lost. And it made it seem as though the Prosecution was concerned enough about the accusations that they needed to take the time to address it. It made it seem as though the Prosecution was on the defensive. It was really genius the way that they did it.

And finally, I would be remiss if I did not mention the Judge - Lance Ito. It seems to me that in an attempt to appear fair, he ultimately made some rather stupid rulings. And, he let the Dream Team run the show. I'm not sure if he was intimidated by the Defence lawyers' grandiose personas, or if he (Ito) wanted to be liked by the "cool" guys - that is, the Dream Team. Whatever the reasoning, some of the court room shenanigans should have been stopped early on. He was taken advantage of and lost complete control of the court room at times.

In my opinion, perhaps the most incredulous ruling he made was to allow OJ to make a statement when he revoked his right to testify. Anyone who is a legal junkie (like me) knows that the one of the main reasons a Defendant takes the stand in his own defence is because juries like to hear him/her say that they didn't do it. Juries like to hear it come right out of the Defendant's mouth. But, of course, the risk is that the Defendant must be cross examined. However, Lance Ito allowed OJ to make a small statement when he revoked his right to testify on his own behalf ... the jury got to hear him say that he did not commit the murders but he was not subjected to a cross examination. It was truly almost an unbelievable ruling.

There are many interesting tid-bits of information throughout the whole book - like, Lance Ito's wife was once Mark Fuhrman's boss; and one of the criminalists could quite possibly have had the sweatshirt that OJ wore during the murders in his hands while collecting evidence in OJ's bedroom, but didn't collect it - he didn't think it looked bloody. It's a great read ... especially if you are a law junkie.

And, I will never forget the day the verdict came down. It was a Monday and I had the day off work - how lucky was I!! At the office, it was known as a "Happy" Monday. I met my Mom for lunch and a little shopping. Our salads were interrupted when I heard the verdict was going to be read. We all crowded around the bar in the restaurant to watch it all unfold live on the television. When the Jury Foreman read their decision aloud, there was an audible gasp from the people around me. All of us were strangers to one another, but we shared something that we would always remember. It couldn't be true ... OJ Simpson had truly gotten away with murder.



Nicole Brown and Ronald Goldman were forgotten. 


, , | comments (1)
The First Sign of Summer
Author: jill
•12:40 PM
It's Wednesday ... and it's suppose to be wordless. However, I have been kinda quiet lately, don't you think? So, I am pretty sure that I cannot be wordless today.

Luckily, that doesn't mean that I cannot have lots of pictures, too.

We spent our Victoria Day much the same as families all over Canada, I suppose. The kids played at the park, Mommy did a little laundry and Daddy did a little barbequing.

But the sure sign that summer has arrived is that we made S'mores for dessert.



Begin with excellent ingredients. Graham Crackers, chocolate, and of course, marshmallows. A couple of things about ingredients - don't be afraid to get creative. Caiden has life-threatening allergies to nuts, so finding chocolate has been a bit of challenge. I will have to admit to having used chocolate chips in the past; however, (my hero) Jonesy found some chocolate wafers at The BulkBarn. They were perfect and I would recommend checking them out if you make S'mores at your house. We used milk chocolate for the kids, and dark chocolate for us adults ... 'cause we're sophisticated n' stuff. I would also recommend using chocolate with nuts, if you are lucky enough to be able to do so. Don't tell my kids, but I have used chocolate with almonds after they have gone to bed. What? Parents do stuff that is fun after their kids go to sleep? Like I said ... don't tell on me. In place of graham crackers, I have tried Simple Pleasures cookies. The spice snaps with melty chocolate and gooey marshmallow ... well, do I need to say any more? Or, the social teas? Or the chocolate wafers?

In any case, gather all your ingredients and head outdoors. Don't forget a glass of wine ... red compliments the chocolate so nicely.



Now, Daddy takes over because he is the king of barbeque. And I readily support this because then I can relax and enjoy my kids and a glass of wine ... not always in that particular order.



While Daddy perfectly toasts the marshmallows, have someone in your family entertain you with interesting stories or absurd questions. This time, Caiden read his latest story to us. He just read Diary of a Wimpy Kid by Jeff Kinney as was inspired to write a diary of his own. My favourite part is the "Copywrite 2010" ... look closely and you'll see it.



Finally, the S'mores are ready to eat.





Three happy kids = One Happy Mommy + One Happy Daddy



Now, in some cases, it is necessary to forego the boring graham cracker and just get the good stuff in the middle. Which I think pretty much exemplifies Addison's life.



Then, after you're all done, you get to just relax. And be kinda silly ... which is really what a holiday is all about, isn't it?
, | comments (1)