•8:29 PM
So, I bet you're wondering ... what exactly is a mom-oholic? I have checked Dictionary.com and there is no listing for "mom-oholic," so maybe it's just a word I made up. But still ... that does not mean that mom-oholics don't exist. It just means that mainstream society has not yet caught on to the idea. Maybe I'll be founder of the Mom-oholics Guild of Canada (MGC) ... it could be like a Quilters' Guild, but the membership would consist of stressed out women, with Type-A personality, who take on way too much and become completely anxiety-ridden at the mere mention of another school bake sale or fun playdate at the park.
Let me introduce myself. My name is Jill and I am a mom-oholic.
A mom-oholic is a person addicted to being a Mom. A mom addict. If you consider the definitions of the word "addict," it all makes sense. According to Dictionary.com, an addict is a person who is addicted to an activity, habit or substance. Therefore, a mom-oholic is addicted to the activities involved in being a Mom. She enjoys making the baby purees, and playing with Lego alongside her child, and watching her child draw picture after picture, and ironing pleats into her baby girl's little skirt and in some bizarre way, she even enjoys changing those little diapers. Everything she does is for her children, and she genuinely takes pleasure in doing these things until her life becomes consumed by them. And then suddenly, the diapers aren't so little anymore. In fact, there aren't even diapers anymore, and yet she continues to hover, her every thought monopolized by what she can do for her kids. Instead of baby food purees, she is making caterpillar cupcakes for kindergarten classes and Thanksgiving cards with treats attached for teachers and students alike.
As a verb, addict is defined as ... to cause to become physiologically or psychologically dependent on an addictive substance, and to habituate and abandon (oneself) to something compulsively and obsessively. Now ... do you know a woman who has not abandoned herself completely to the little being that has just entered her life? After all, that is the beauty of a baby - they suck you in until you are utterly physiologically and psychologically dependent on them, which usually takes a few mere seconds. Most would say that a baby is dependent on its mother, however in the case of the mom-oholic, the mother is equally as dependent on the child. For instance, I can't imagine not touching my children every day ... I need to, for my own well-being. Now, satisfying this need is never a problem for me because I never leave them for more than a few hours. Are you beginning to see my problem for what it is?
Do you want full disclosure? I did not leave my first baby until he was fifteen months old. Not once ... not even with his father. I did not run down to the pharmacy for twenty minutes. I did not go out for lunch with a friend. I did not pop over to the grocery store. Ever. And the reason I finally did leave him was because I was pregnant with my first daughter and my mother insisted that there needed to be some separation to prepare Caiden for becoming a big brother. So, I did it because my Mom said that I had to ... that is the only reason.
Every Mom probably has an addiction to her children ... but some manage their addiction better than others. I let myself become so intertwined in my children that I lost myself. So, this blog is for me ... to help take myself back.
Before I had children, I read all the time. I always had a book on the go. Most times it was fiction, but I also read biographies and non-fiction. And, of course, I read cook books. After I got pregnant for the first time, I read nothing but books about being pregnant and child-rearing and cooking for children. My life revolved around them ... my sweet babies. Until about one year ago, when I found a book written by Anderson Cooper, called Dispatches from the Edge. It is one of the most honest, heart-breaking books I have read. I felt like I was intruding on something personal that was really none of my business. And I was fascinated, by both Anderson's story and remembering what it was like to enjoy reading just for the sake of reading.
So, I have decided to challenge myself with something that I enjoy. Because I need to do something for me. Now I just sound selfish, don't I? Ha! It's all about me now ... me, me, me. Maybe I've got an addiction-prone personality and I'll become a me-oholic! Stick around ... it could be that you'd like to join me, fellow mom-oholics ... on my challenge ... on my recovery ... on my journey.
Follow my blog, check back often ... we'll do it together!
Let me introduce myself. My name is Jill and I am a mom-oholic.
A mom-oholic is a person addicted to being a Mom. A mom addict. If you consider the definitions of the word "addict," it all makes sense. According to Dictionary.com, an addict is a person who is addicted to an activity, habit or substance. Therefore, a mom-oholic is addicted to the activities involved in being a Mom. She enjoys making the baby purees, and playing with Lego alongside her child, and watching her child draw picture after picture, and ironing pleats into her baby girl's little skirt and in some bizarre way, she even enjoys changing those little diapers. Everything she does is for her children, and she genuinely takes pleasure in doing these things until her life becomes consumed by them. And then suddenly, the diapers aren't so little anymore. In fact, there aren't even diapers anymore, and yet she continues to hover, her every thought monopolized by what she can do for her kids. Instead of baby food purees, she is making caterpillar cupcakes for kindergarten classes and Thanksgiving cards with treats attached for teachers and students alike.
As a verb, addict is defined as ... to cause to become physiologically or psychologically dependent on an addictive substance, and to habituate and abandon (oneself) to something compulsively and obsessively. Now ... do you know a woman who has not abandoned herself completely to the little being that has just entered her life? After all, that is the beauty of a baby - they suck you in until you are utterly physiologically and psychologically dependent on them, which usually takes a few mere seconds. Most would say that a baby is dependent on its mother, however in the case of the mom-oholic, the mother is equally as dependent on the child. For instance, I can't imagine not touching my children every day ... I need to, for my own well-being. Now, satisfying this need is never a problem for me because I never leave them for more than a few hours. Are you beginning to see my problem for what it is?
Do you want full disclosure? I did not leave my first baby until he was fifteen months old. Not once ... not even with his father. I did not run down to the pharmacy for twenty minutes. I did not go out for lunch with a friend. I did not pop over to the grocery store. Ever. And the reason I finally did leave him was because I was pregnant with my first daughter and my mother insisted that there needed to be some separation to prepare Caiden for becoming a big brother. So, I did it because my Mom said that I had to ... that is the only reason.
Every Mom probably has an addiction to her children ... but some manage their addiction better than others. I let myself become so intertwined in my children that I lost myself. So, this blog is for me ... to help take myself back.
Before I had children, I read all the time. I always had a book on the go. Most times it was fiction, but I also read biographies and non-fiction. And, of course, I read cook books. After I got pregnant for the first time, I read nothing but books about being pregnant and child-rearing and cooking for children. My life revolved around them ... my sweet babies. Until about one year ago, when I found a book written by Anderson Cooper, called Dispatches from the Edge. It is one of the most honest, heart-breaking books I have read. I felt like I was intruding on something personal that was really none of my business. And I was fascinated, by both Anderson's story and remembering what it was like to enjoy reading just for the sake of reading.
So, I have decided to challenge myself with something that I enjoy. Because I need to do something for me. Now I just sound selfish, don't I? Ha! It's all about me now ... me, me, me. Maybe I've got an addiction-prone personality and I'll become a me-oholic! Stick around ... it could be that you'd like to join me, fellow mom-oholics ... on my challenge ... on my recovery ... on my journey.
Follow my blog, check back often ... we'll do it together!
2 comments:
Wow! Very introspective, dear. I can't wait to read more!
This does not sound like the Jill I know and still sounds like the Jill I know!! Grietje